🦄 Manifest Your Mate (While Ditching The Dicks and Dick-ettes)

🦄 Manifest Your Mate (While Ditching The Dicks and Dick-ettes)

Because You Deserve More Than Half-Assed Texts and “U up?” at 2 am.

Let’s get one thing straight: Manifesting your dream partner is NOT about vision boards plastered with shirtless celebrities or meditating so hard you pass out in a Himalayan salt lamp coma.

It’s about becoming so magnetic, aligned, and unbothered that the right person doesn’t just show up — they show up on time, emotionally available, with stars and hearts in their eyes.

Ready to call in a partner who feels like home, balance a checkbook, and knows how to load a dishwasher correctly? Let’s manifest that magic, baby.

 🪞 Step 1: Would You Date You?

Whenever I bring up “Would YOU date you?” to my clients, their eyes get huge. 

“I never thought of that!”  

That’s right, before you go asking the Universe for a 6'2" Adonis who meditates, bakes gluten-free muffins, and texts good morning memes — let’s take a loving look in the mirror.

✨ Ask yourself:

Are you the kind of partner you would want?

Are you emotionally available... or do you still stalk your ex’s new boo on Instagram?

Do you have your shit together… or are you still using that “I grew up in a dysfunctional family” as the reason why you’re a shit show…at the age of 36?

Don’t worry — we’ve all been there. The good news? The fastest way to attract someone amazing is to become someone amazing.  Someone interesting.  Someone who does really cool shit and lives life to the fullest.  You don’t have to be perfect.  Just be real, be open, and be willing to grow with the flow.

📜 Step 2: Burn the Grocery List. Make a Soul List.

We get it. You want them to be tall, tan, toned, rich, and emotionally fluent in five love languages.

But here’s the truth: Your dream partner is NOT a Build-A-Bae.

Instead of obsessing over specifics like eye color, job title, or how many days a week they work out, start focusing on how you want to feel in the relationship.

✨ Try this:

Make a list of how you want to feel with your partner.  Do you want to feel loved? Safe?  Laughing?  Do you want to be the main character in a romantic comedy that doesn’t suck?

Identify the values that are important to you.  Trust. Humor. Ambition. The ability to build IKEA projects without emotionally combusting.

Your soul doesn’t give a damn if they’re 6'0" or 5'9" in heels.  Your soul cares how you feel when you’re with them, and whether it’s safe to be your gloriously weird and twisted self.

🧹 Step 3: Take Out the Trash (Old Lovers, Limiting Beliefs & Emotional Clutter)

If you’re still emotionally hosting the ghosts of exes from your past, it’s time to spiritually sage your love life.

You can’t manifest new love when:

You’re cyberstalking your exes new wedding photos “just out of curiosity”

You’re keeping your toxic situation-ship on emotional speed dial

You’re believing all the good ones are “taken, gay, or in a coma”

✨ It’s time to detox:

Now’s a great time to write breakup letters to your old stories: "Love never works out for me.”  "I'm too much for someone to handle.”  I’m not enough.”  “I’m so broken nobody would ever want me.”

Thank those stories for the role they played in your life, keeping you safe from meeting the real assholes and bitches.

Tell those stories to get the fuck out of your energetic field, because you need to make room for the new you that’s worthy, awesome, amazing, and ready for adventure.  Make it a ceremony.  Extra points if it involves meditation, a bath, or sage.

Stopping “the suck” of being alone is the path to setting you free.  Open your heart.  Be relaxed, alert, and waiting.

📡 Step 4: Broadcast Your Love Vibe (Even If Your Vibe Is "Pajamas & Snacks")

Manifestation isn’t magic — it’s science, baby. You attract what you feel, not what you say. If your vibe is "I’m lonely, please love me!" — guess what you’ll attract?

I remember one time when I was lonely, I asked the universe to send me “someone to hang out with.”  The Universe answered in spectacular fashion!  It sent me the most boring person on the planet…AND…he talked slow AF.   Goodbye!

Then I asked the universe to send me someone who likes to travel.  The Universe again said, “Absolutely!”  And sent me a guy 30+ years older than me, who began monopolizing my travel plans to the point I was having anxiety attacks about the trip.  Ugh.   (I went by myself and had the best time ever!)

Think of ordering a partner from The Universe like ordering a meal from a fancy restaurant.  If you order a steak and don’t tell the server what cut or how you like it cooked, the medium-rare filet mignon you were hoping for might come back as a well-done eye of round.  

Here are some tips on how to manifest your mate, because if you consistently put out a clingy, weird energy, get ready for desperation and downers:

✨ Flip the script:

Act as if you already have the partner of your dreams.

Smile like you're harboring a delicious secret.

Take yourself out. Buy yourself flowers. Treat yourself the way you want to be treated.

Instead of “Please pick me,” radiate “I’m the prize.” 

People will start noticing. So will the Universe. So will everyone else feel your good vibes.

🚪 Step 5: Leave Your Damn House (Or at Least Open Your Heart)

Look, we love Netflix and DoorDash too, but your dream partner probably isn’t going to break into your apartment and fall in love with you on the spot. 

✨ Instead:

Say yes to invites, even weird ones.  Especially the weird ones.  (Drum circle?  Goat yoga?  Law of Attraction meet-up?  I’ve done them and if nothing else, you learn shit and become more interesting as a result.)

Follow the “downloads” from The Universe.  If the thought “I should take a Japanese cook class,” that’s a download from The Universe and just DO IT.   

Be visible. Be open. Be a little awkward.  Be human.  Be curious.

Real love rarely shows up when you're constantly hunting for it.  When you give up, quit looking, or trust the process…the love of your life will see you living and laughing, instead of obsessing about when your Prince or Princess will arrive.

⏳ Step 6: Detach from the Timeline (You’re Not Amazon Prime)

I know. You want love now. You’ve got the playlist ready, the drawer cleaned out, and the playlist of “songs we’ll slow dance to in the kitchen” curated.

But here’s the sexy secret:  The less you chase, the faster it flows.

✨ Your job:

Let go of when, how, and where.

Trust the Universe’s matchmaking algorithm.

Live so fully and love yourself so deeply that the relationship becomes the icing, not the whole damn cake.

When they show up, it won’t be because you hunted them down. It’ll be because you bloomed so brightly they couldn’t help but find you.

💖 You’re Not Looking for a Partner. You’re Attracting a Mirror.

Manifesting the partner of your dreams isn’t about chasing or settling or compromising yourself into a romantic coma.

It’s about becoming the most unapologetic, radiant, emotionally available version of you — and trusting that love can’t miss someone that aligned.

• 🪄 Get clear.

• 🧹 Get cleaned up.

• 💃 Get vibrant.

• 🧲 Then let the magic happen.

And when that dreamy human shows up — the one who matches your soul, challenges your growth, and laughs at your weirdest jokes — you’ll know you called them in on purpose.